Things you’d never know without the movies
During all police investigations it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once.
All telephone numbers begin 555.
If you decide to dance in the streets, every one you meet will know all the steps.
Most dogs are immortal.
If being chased through a town, you will usually be able to take refuge in a St. Patrick’s Day parade at any time of the year.
All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets which reach up to a woman’s armpits but only to the waist of the man lying next to her.
All grocery bags contain at least one loaf of French bread.
It’s easy for anyone to land a large passenger jet provided someone is in a control tower to talk them down.
Once applied, lipstick never rubs off –even when scuba diving.
The ventilation shafts of any building are perfect escape routes and hiding places. No one will ever think of looking for you there, and you can travel conveniently to any other part of the building without difficulty.
If you need to reload your gun, you will have plenty of ammunition at hand – even if you haven’t been carrying any before.
You will probably survive any battle in a war unless you show someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.
Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, you need not speak the language – just fake the accent.
If your town is threatened by an imminent disaster or killer bees, the mayor’s first concern will be the impact on the tourist trade or his forthcoming art exhibit.
The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.
A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.
If a large pane of glass is visible, someone or something will be thrown through it.
When paying for a taxi, do not look for your wallet – just grab a bill at random and thrust it into the driver’s hand.
Interbreeding is genetically possible with any creature anywhere in the cosmos.
Kitchens have no light switches. When entering a kitchen at night, open the refrigerator and light will flood the room.
If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate all suspicious noises in their most revealing underwear.
Word processors never display a cursor, but always say: Enter password now.
Mothers routinely cook eggs, bacon, waffles for their family every morning even though their husband and children never have time to eat the breakfast.
Cars that crash inevitably burst into a ball of fire.
The Chief of Police will always suspend his star detective – or give him 48 hours to finish the job.
A single match can illumine a room the size of the Superdome.
Medieval peasants and buxom peasant women have perfect teeth.
Although in the 20th century it was possible to fire weapons at an object out of visual range, people in the 23rd century will have lost this technology.
Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.
It is not necessary to say hello or goodbye when beginning or ending phone conversations.
Even when driving down a perfectly straight street, it is necessary to turn the car’s steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few seconds.
Bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they are set to go off.
Detectives can only solve cases when they are suspended from the force.
Most laptop computers are so powerful they can override the communication systems of invading alien civilizations.
It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a martial arts fight – your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner.
When someone is knocked unconscious by a blow to the head, they never suffer brain damage or a concussion.
No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion, volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.
Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
When alone, foreigners prefer to speak English with one another.
You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.
Any lock can be picked with a credit card and/or a paper clip – in seconds. Unless, of course, it’s a door in a burning building with a child trapped inside.
An electric fence powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an 8 yr old child.
Television and news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at that precise moment.