The mind, it boggles
So the big news making its way through the feminist blog scene today is coming out of Colorado, where an anti-choice group is now attempting to collect enough signatures to get a measure on the ballot that defines a fertilized egg as a person.
A person?
*blink*
Of course, it’s being done to pave the way to outlaw abortion. But I’m thinking if we are going to take it that far, let’s just do it all the way, shall we?
Hormone based contraceptives? Going to have to be banned. Sorry ladies, but it’s a known fact that your pill makes your uterus inhospitable to a fertilized egg.
Barrier based contraceptives? They interfer with the natural order of things. Banned.
You don’t even have to ask about emergency contraceptives, do you? Banned.
Miscarriage? That will have to be re-evaluated. I’m sure we can find a way to get you on manslaughter, you egg killing godless heathen.
Abortion? Clearly, that’s murder. You are goin’ to the pokey, bitch. And your doctor will be in the cell next to you.
I also suspect Colorado will need to institute, at a very minimum, required monthly gyno visits to ensure you are taking good care of the baby making machine. If you are found to not be taking care of it, I’m sure that can be grounds for some lawsuit or another.
What else? Ah, the most important thing of all. How does that egg get fertilized anyway? Oh, right, sperm.
Well, here’s the deal boys. Every time you spill that and an egg isn’t fertilized, you are taking a potential tax payer away from the state of Colorado. You are going to have to just stop that, right this minute! Think about the children!
Oh, and as far as being able to use your fertilized “persons” as a tax deduction? Don’t be silly, that would be going just a bit too far, don’t you think?